I felt an utter need to document my thoughts... Somehow "blogspot" seem like the obvious choice. I think of some interesting things, but I'll just chase to the cut.
Right now I'm kind of pissed and feeling close to what they call depressed? Fuck that word "depressed"; I hate it and so should you. Let's call it "Blegh". On being blegh, I find myself wondering what led me to this position I am in right now. One day it all felt pretty good and was going "according to plan", but all of a sudden the tides shifted and blegh decided to show up. Don't take me wrong, blegh has appeared before and I've managed to send it back to the blegh-farm.. but recently it has become overwhelming.
I find myself thinking about the good ol' days when the worst thing that could happen was that I didn't have any clean underwear to put on. Dogs barking and heat wake me up today. I could use a vacation from the vacation. Why? I don't have a steady job. The economy decided to play hardball with creative people. If you don't bend over backwards then you might as well try to find a way for others to bend for you; which is almost impossible. As we raise our consciousness towards our true potential, everyone is realizing they have some tight shit to offer to the world. Hence the term competition sprouts. Competing for what? Money? I don't know, really. At first it looked as if we were pursuing "the dream". Right now it doesn't feel like that at all. It feels like we're just running from death and starvation. In simpler terms, we're just trying to survive.
Give me a chance to prove my creativity, my worth.. I got a lot to offer, but to who? Making a plan sure sucks when it starts bad right off the bat. Here I am whinning about shit looking to reciprocate with any other life form. Seriously, if you're a monkey then I still want to read what your concerns are.
This concludes my broadcast for today.
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